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Fox Sports Golf ‘99

Score: 50%
ESRB: Everyone
Publisher: Fox Interactive
Developer: Gremlin Interactive
Media: CD/1
Players: 1 - 2
Genre: Sports (Golf)

Graphics & Sound:

Pathetic. The menu screens for Fox Sports Golf ‘99 are confusing and hard to navigate. Most of the graphics are muddy and uninspired, and others are simple bitmaps, like the trees. When you are close to the trees (which you will be, often), they look like crap. Or they look like big blotches of graph paper colored in different shades of green. Most of the sound comes from the announcer, who gets my vote for the most freakin’ annoying moron award.

Gameplay:

It’s golf, which I’m told is very relaxing to play. Fox Sports Golf is not. You aim your shot, you press a button, wait for the power meter to fill, than press the button again to hit the ball. Then the announcer says something idiotic.

Difficulty:

I don’t know if Fox Sports Golf ‘99 is hard because it’s challenging, or because it sucks so bad. I really didn’t hang around to find out.

Game Mechanics:

What can I say, I really hated Fox Sports Golf ‘99, and it should never have been released. It’s just bad. I would rather break the game disc into razor-sharp shards and jab them into my eyeballs than play this game again.

Y’ know, lots of people think reviewing video games is fun and easy. I mean c’mon, we play games weeks to months before they come out. But there’s a side to game reviewing most people don’t even think about: some games are bad. Some aren’t fun to play. And some really suck. And you know what the hardest part about trashing a crappy game in a review? No, it’s not thinking of witty one-liners to make fun of said bad game. It’s the realization that people worked hard on the game. I’m sure many, many hours were spent working on even the worst games, and the designers and programmers tried their best to make everything come together. Sometimes, everything falls into place and the game rocks. Sometimes, everything falls apart and the game sucks. Well, I’ve bought crappy games before. I know how it feels when you’ve blown $50-60 and all you have is a big pile of suck. If I can help one person save a few bucks by not buying a crappy game, I feel my work is done. That being said, avoid Fox Sports Golf ‘99.


-Glom, GameVortex Communications
AKA Pete Maher

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